revrannulf

being myself the best way I can

Archive for the tag “loss”

I Will Be With You

jessica sleepy

It’s been some time now, I keep thinkin’ you will call
Or send a line of silly text, or holler down the hall
I ‘waken in the night, prayers abjectly send
Beg to hold you in my arms and make this nightmare end

I know you didn’t choose it, the chasm that you crossed
Didn’t see it coming, or the chances that were lost
I stand here with nothing but tears and empty cries
Trying to learn what to do as I wonder why you died

The people, oh they mean well, but it doesn’t help a thing
When I think about your flute and the way you made it sing
It wasn’t always perfect, sometimes you were out of breath
But the tune was in your heart so strong and now there’s nothing left

Yes, I’ve got the memories but I’d rather hold your hand
Rather watch your play your games and wander on the sand
I’d rather just ‘bout anything than this empty, broken heart
That mourns and cries and tears this poor daddy all apart

Ain’t but loss and really there is nothing I can do
Still I travel in my mind and wonder if it’s true
That somewhere, somehow, someday…
I will be with you

The future is but yesterday that never did come true
And I would trade ‘em all away if I could be with you
Walkin’ as the leaves fall, kaleidoscopic view
Of autumn colored magic in ever varied hue

Or better yet a snowy day your nose just slightly blue
Cured by some hot chocolate and laughs between us two
Just a glimpse of your warm smile or your angel in the snow
But I’m bereft, broken-hearted wonderin’ why you had to go

Ain’t but loss and really there is nothing I can do
Still I travel in my mind and wonder if it’s true
That somewhere, somehow, someday
I will be with you

By Randy Creath 9/27/2015

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So Many and So Many Times

Some days I mourn for the might have been

And long for the things that seem lost

The fame, the road, and the roaring of fans

The romance, the lights, and the kisses they’d toss

 

I wonder if I’d have made a different choice

Would I be who I have become?

And then the keys or guitar or the woman I love

Calm my fears and they welcome me home

 

Living as me is a puzzle I’ve found

Battered and buffered in the waves of sound

The roaring of wind and sighs of the sea

A shattered canoe but yet again found

 

I’ve tried and I’ve tried as hard as I know

In a sea the color of rhymes

The storms and calm times they’ve ebbed and they flowed

I’ve failed so many and so many times

 

Quiet at night I listen to her breathe

And I rest near the touch of her skin

The dreams and nightmares all fade away

As I look toward tomorrow again

An Ultimate Togetherness

Spending the last few days in thought…

about dying.

Thinking about the death

of those who showed me the way…

Considering the rare gift of

being in the right place

at the right time,

has led me to deep sadness,

thankful joy,

the silent mystic crossroads,

and the clarity of perception

that only comes with

facing the certainty

that all of us

everyone

will have someday

caused someone else

to find themselves in the past perfect act of

having spent their last few days in thought.

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